“YOU PIG!”
And then I slapped him.
The end.
The longer story, you ask?
Well, I once knew a man who reminded me of a pig.
In a thousand typical scenes you see women slapping
men and calling them pigs, right?
But this guy had a snout that loved to consume more
than any man I’d known before.
Well, you may say, this is a successful
human being, surely?
Embrace life, inhale joy, inject pleasure; whatever you
can get your mits, paws, or hooves on.
He even looked like a pig. Big, loud, and proud.
There was even a ruddy, passionate flush
to his leathery skin.
But you know the sad thing?
It took me a long time to get over my temporary,
significant feelings for this creature.
Why, you may ask?
Admittedly, he wasn’t the first animal I had
temporarily appropriated.
So, there were tears, like with the others, but this one
brought many more.
But why, if he was so pig-like?
Because he was a pig with a philosophy.
And I bought into that story, that world.
I bought into an illusion I wished to see.
“YOU (COLOURFUL) PIG!”
I later read a book on yoga.
It said that the source of all energy gives us facility and
faith according to our desire.
At the time I met this man, I had big desires.
I knew I wanted more from life than what “normal
people” seemed to be satisfied with.
The monotony, the grey, the material.
So, to meet someone with atypical and eye-catching
colour and zest …
Someone who didn’t limit or restrict himself the way
these office workers and white-picket-fencers did …
… well, he was so polar opposite, he must
have been spiritual, right?!
He felt spiritual.
For lack of a better adjective, and lack of another
person to spend the dark nights with.
“YOU (GREEDY) PIG”
If you’ve ever spent time with real pigs, you may have
noticed that they never stop.
They are head-down, hyper-focused beings.
Determined, absorbed, insatiable.
I liked that kind of intensity.
A stark, shiny contrast to the blasé radio-and-TV,
meat-and-two-vege guy.
I mean, most of his qualities weren’t bad, they were
simply misdirected.
We all have that choice, to look down at the
mud or up to the stars.
As for him, I’m not sure he ever even took a breath, let
alone noticed the sky.
He quickly scoured his way through his plans and
people, with focus and efficiency, never staying in one
place long enough to be held accountable.
Addictions, stories, enjoyments of any sort.
Scavenging for anyone he could squeeze some juice from.
He wasn’t fussy, and never felt guilty.
And yet people would continue to buzz around him,
drawn in like mosquitos searching for his light.
His dedication was like a magnet for the dry,
envious hearts, mourning for their own lost
hopes of “freedom.”
Holding out hope for a bit of what he had, which
looked like freedom but didn’t taste like it.
“YOU (SELFISH) PIG!”
See, pigs have bodies made for higher sensual and
sexual capacity than humans.
By hook or by crook, by inheritance or by karma, some
humans seem to have those capacities heightened too.
Or maybe they just scour and scrimp and snuffle with
that bit more drive.
This glorified lust for life is a kind of faith.
Such people often manage to justify, or “spiritualise”
their activities with mottos encouraging the laymen.
“You are number one.”
“Love yourself.”
“Love every moment.”
Warped tantra; ‘Me’ mantras.
Exploitation at its most wholesome.
Quite simply eating, competing, and, by nature of the
beast, quite often cheating.
You could just call a pig a pig …
But when a pig wants to feel like he’s more than a pig
Well, these sentimentalities just take the edge off a bit.
Abandoning inhibition (“that’s just other people trying
to control you, anyway”).
Abandoning responsibility (“that’s just society trying
to control you, anyway”).
Abandoning principles (“that’s just some out-of-date
morality from an out-of-date God who is trying to
control you, anyway”).
Simply and solely maximising pleasure at every moment.
To me it sounded liberating.
I can meditate all the time: meditating on how to
increase my enjoyment.
Is it selfish?
Well that’s what I thought at first.
But, trust me, if you affirm, intoxicate, and occupy
yourself enough, it will sound better.
“YOU (LYING) PIG!”
So that was pretty much his story.
Some people pad it out into whole books that
become bestsellers
Because people want to feel good about feeling good.
And it feels really good to put yourself first without
shame for a little while.
It feels so good and so different, the heightened
pleasure can be mistaken for spirituality.
But when others put themselves first,
especially at our expense.
Or people take it too far and lose sense.
In those moments of sobriety, you question:
What would the world be like if everybody
was living like this?
Are there lines?
Is there morality?
Although we make excuses for our own unique
rule-breaking, at our core, most humans do believe
in humanity.
We generally call those who don’t sociopaths.
Even scientists who make claims about us being no
more than animals made of chemicals
Don’t actually live as if that were true.
Whatever your poison, the reality bears true:
Selfish carnality is not a sustainable or satisfactory
(and is certainly not a spiritual) way to live.
“YOU (HYPOCRITICAL) PIG!”
And the reality of my life slowly dawned.
I realised that even before I met our protagonist pig, I
hadn’t been too much different.
I may have looked it.
I may have told myself I had principles (as I declined a
pipe with disdain but accepted a rollie with relish).
Yet every weekend, there I was, locked in to a selfcreated
enclosure of limited options.
Which variety of intoxication to take?
What soundtrack to do it to?
Whose sponge to squeeze?
So maybe my grass was a bit better kept,
but it certainly wasn’t greener.
And what’s the point of having tidy grass anyway if
you’re not worried about what the neighbours think?
So I took his advice and dug it up.
Deeper down to new realms of degradation.
I tried to bring my eyes down to see what he saw.
I got duped.
I was an astral dreamer, a navel-gazer, and simply
confused about whether I should go up or down.
Inward or outward.
And thinking I could go outward and find permanent
happiness in a world of impermanence.
I got duped.
I tried, I really tried to find limitlessness
through limited senses.
I was also so many animals.
And the moment I realised that, I could forgive him.
“YOU (SPIRITUAL) HUMAN!”
The fact you’re reading this now means your
spirit is in a human body.
Maybe you can relate to it.
Maybe you can to a small degree,
but you’re good at keeping score.
The intelligent animals are very careful and calculating
merchants in their unique exploiting arrangements.
The thing is, humans have a very special gift bestowed
upon them by nature that is distinct from the animals:
The ability to read articles.
To ask questions.
To choose what story they buy and how
they conduct their life.
The only thing that is not temporary in this world
is consciousness, the symptom of the individual life force
In every living being.
Your spirit is not an animal, and it’s not a
human for that matter.
You, the spirit, are wrapped inside.
The same magic that gives life to everything sentient,
that scientists are unable to replicate or define.
You want proof?
There is the YOU that observes the changes in your
hair colour, age, and opinions.
Nature reincarnates that deepest internal identity,
which simply observes all the external changes, into a
new body after each cycle.
Your next one will be more suitable for your desires
based on your present actions.
So if your current priorities are anything like a pig’s,
your future is looking pink.
Same goes for the birds and trees around us.
Love to skydive?
Your future has feathers.
Love to stand still for selfies?
Your future is naked for months at a time and
still for millennia.
Pigs, birds, and trees can’t read articles.
Only the humans can strip away the fur and fizz,
crepe and glitz, to discover the true essence and
purpose of life.
“YOU (POOR) HUMAN!”
My old boar of an ex-boyfriend, bless him,
died recently aged thirty-five.
The ancient bhakti-yoga science is there to be read.
The quest for knowledge of the soul is the priority.
The only wealth we can take with us.
Our best investment.
Our true self care, if we care enough to
contemplate our future.
Meditate: ironically, the best enjoyment comes
from giving enjoyment.
Especially to the most dynamic individual in the most
dynamic relationship
That internal link between our consciousness and
the source of our consciousness.
The whole to which we are a part, who is
everywhere and yet a personality.
That person is the only one who can satisfy you.
So be clever.
Give to the purest to take the purest.
Small changes with big consequences.
Oink.
Om.
